Thursday, October 10, 2013

on being bipolar

This post will be brutally honest. It will be a look inside me, my brain, my soul.. It's a scary place, well only scary because it's different. So if you don't like different, if you are going to be judgmental, discriminating, critical, cynical, or condescending, just go ahead and close out this tab and head on back to Facebook.

In my last personal post I came out of the bipolar closet.... well, kind of. I guess if you're around me, you know I'm up and down a lot. It's a struggle.

"I want to sit with you right now... Cause some days you're nice. And some days you're mean." -Isabella, age 3.

I've been watching [when I say watching, it means that I let it play on my laptop or the iPad while I do dishes, cook, clean, crochet.. fold laundry.] Say Yes to the Dress. The other day there was a girl on there who just couldn't find a dress, she had OCD. Like bad. She'd wash her hands til she bled bad. So "saying yes to the dress" and actually making that decision was so hard for her. It made me sad. You could tell that she just wanted to scream, she just wanted to be normal for a bit. Just enjoy the experience without over thinking it. Though I don't have OCD I can understand her struggle. The wishing you could just get over it and be normal, but feeling this wall that just shuts you out of that "normalcy" that you can see in others. I see moms that have a full day, that get to paint chairs, work out, take their kids to activities, keep their house tidy, make 3 meals most days. and still have time to hang out with their friends once or twice a week.. That blows my mind. I don't even get it. How?! HOW do you do that?! I have my good times, when I'm on a roll and I'm all, "Check me out! I'm an adult!" and then there's those slumps. The house is a wreck, the kids are dirty and we're eating cereal from the last 2 clean bowls. During a craft show, after just having a baby, or just during a stressful time, that would be acceptable to me. But every couple of weeks?! Ugh. It kills me. Then I feel busy, full of energy ready to take on every project and the world. But it takes all that energy for me to get things caught back up. I understand that you should just keep up with the dishes girl. Just suck it up and do it. Duh. Easy peasy right? It should be. Then why is it so daunting to me?! Why is keeping a balance so hard. I've struggled with this for as long as I can remember. A lot of people don't get it. They just don't. And that's ok. Just be nice. Don't judge. On my good days, I bet I'd run circles around you.

I am not a morning person, ever. Even on my good days. I mean, I think that the whole world agrees that waking up is hard. On those really, really bad days for me, it's even harder. I wake up feeling like I haven't slept at all. Like I could just go right on sleeping. For days. I've been trying to head that off by waking up extra early and going to the gym at least 2-3 times a week. On the days that I do, I love it. Waking up is still hard, but when I come home I have to shower, get breakfast, wake the kids up, and get D to school. Then I come home, feed the dogs and water the plants.. [I've kepts a few plants + herbs alive y'all!! woo hoo!] That sets the tone for the day and I have a plan and take care of business. I'd like to thank my darling friend Shannon for getting me hooked on the early morning work out thing. Shannon is a stud... She teaches cardio kickboxing at the YMCA and totally kicks people's egos to the curb. The best part about early morning work outs is that no matter what the rest of the day throws at you, you've already worked out and can just go to bed when the kids do. Like 8pm. I think appreciation for an early bed times just comes with growing older..

My psychiatrist and I have decided that this little routine and having a game plan for the day is my best way of coping with my moods. I thrive with order. But then.. I'm also an all or nothing type of girl.. when that morning routine is broken, I feel like I should just give up and start again the next day. That sucks. It takes a lot for me to snap out of it.

Another thing that I have found helpful are friends. Cutting a lot of crappy friends out. Not where you thought I was going with this huh? Well, I made a list. One of my best friends, I think she's my best friend actually.. though we don't go around doing the whole "besties!" thing because.. well, that's stupid. She once said, "friendships are supposed to be easy. No making excuses, just honest and easy. Relationships with family and your partner, those are the ones that require so much work." And she's right. So I decided to evaluate my friendships. I didn't have any bad friends really, but I did let people use me. I did get overwhelmed taking care of my friends and not myself or my family. I did let friends influence me going to Sonic for lunch and letting the kids play, then going to the park even though I know I should get home and work on orders or whatever. I didn't want to miss out. I'd stay up late to get things done, then was a zombie during the day.

Those friends didn't get it. So we don't hang out as much anymore. I've made 3 sections on my "friends list": 1. friends I'll see at holiday parties and birthday parties (most people) 2. friends that are definitely keepers (4 people I think) and 3. "friends" that I don't want as friends at all, that if I never saw or heard from them again I couldn't care less.. (only 2 on this one!) That may be harsh. But that's how my mind works best, with lists, compartments, and boundaries. I've never had boundaries before. People would talk to me about anything and I'd over share and get overly attached and try to mother everyone. People don't want you to be their mother Emma!

Learning boundaries, having a routine... er.. a FLEXIBLE routine, and being true to myself no matter what, that's what I need. That's what will help me. But besides all that.. because all that really just goes to the crapper more often than I'd like and then what?! Besides all that I know in my heart, my soul what I need. "The only one that can satisfy the human heart is the one who created it" -C.S. Lewis. I need God. I need to surrender, walk with, remember, even notice God. That's the hardest for me. I have a control issue, it's all or nothing like I've said before, so allowing someone else to guide me and let me lean on them is SO hard for me. It's a daily struggle. Surrender, just be. Just go with it. Be present, live your life, don't just exist. As a mom, as a friend, as a very conscious person I've realized that the best way to love, the biggest gift you could give to your spouse, your children, your family, your friends is to just let them be. Let them be themselves, let them grow and learn, and be there for them. No judgement, no meanness, just love. Douglas and Isabella behave well [for the most part], I have high standards and we have rules.. but they can choose to love ballet, and hip hop, and candy. And I'll encourage them to love those things that THEY want.. but I'll also make them brush their teeth, and practice their dance, and do good in school. Just like I know Mathew loves the gym and being fit, and pricey running shoes... But I also know when I should get him a bowl of ice cream because he's had a bad day.. and then tell him no to seconds.

That's how God works. Look around, he gave us this. It's up to us to choose what we do with it, he lets us be. Why not be great?!

Monday, September 16, 2013

Hi, my name is Emma

and I may be a little overwhelmed... I'm going to tell you everything that has been going on.. then maybe later in the week (month) I'll expand on it.

The gym my husband owns with a friend is opening it's second location. I know I'm part owner too, but I feel weird saying that. Because it's really his thing. So when people ask if I own it I say, "my husband does." We've been working around the clock (him more than me) to get it open. Hopefully we can by the end of the week.

I've changed Created to EmmaMade. My hats are in a retail store.

I'm planning a big indie craft show for March 2014. I'm hosting it. I'M putting it together. It's something I've been wanting so bad! I found the location, got all the paperwork/permits/rules figured out. I'm going for it!

Douglas is in kindergarten. He's there more than he is home it feels like. He goes from 8-3 Monday through Friday. I miss him. I'm also room parent for his class. But he's also developed a social anxiety thing. Maybe it's a phase. But his daddy kind of does the same thing. He's in a boys hip hop class.

Isabella is obsessed with ballet. Also tinkerbell and Holly Golightly. Yes, Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast At Tiffany's. She acts like she's 25. But she's cute I guess. She is in a ballet class.

Mathew goes in for another CAT scan next month. There's a chance he may have to have another surgery.

I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Bipolar 2. Not the super intense bipolar 1. Not the Silver Lining's Playbook bipolar. I'm ok saying it now. I'm ok talking about it. Now that it's real. At first I just thought I was lazy/ill equipped/not cut out for life as an adult. There's those dumb people. Ok, they aren't dumb, maybe ignorant, inconsiderate people who believe that mental illnesses aren't real. And honestly, I agree with them to an extent. Now a days every child out there has ADD and every adult has fibromyalgia or depression. But I honestly believe that we just don't take care of ourselves. There's no discipline. No spirituality, it's looked down upon, who has time for it?! there's no eating healthy, it's about convenience. Exercising?! what? that doesn't fit into my schedule. Not to mention all the full time moms that also have a full time job. I fortunately can stay home with my children. I love it so much. But when I went to talk to someone about my issues I was worried that they would tell me that I was bored and should take a class or get a job. Honestly I can't imagine ever being bored. I love life, love painting, drawing, crocheting, baking, decorating cakes, watching comedies, documentaries. Who can get bored with the internet around?! Betty Draper said it best, "only boring people get bored." But society has a stigma about stay at home moms. We do not stay home eating bon bons and watching soap operas... one of my husband's closest friends even asked him about me, "Doesn't she want more?" More?! More. I couldn't ask for more. I have my little handmade business, I help my husband in his endeavors, I'm in charge of a household. That's a lot. Things that until not too long ago took  a whole stream of servants to do. Uh, Downton Abbey anyone?! lol a cook, a teacher, a driver, errands, organization, cleaning. Just talking about it wears me out. Add an in town job to that?! no thank you. I admire those who choose to or have to do that. But for me, my place, my happy place, is at home. listening to my children laugh and play while I make a pie. That's joy. But when sadness, not wanting to get out of bed to even feed your children, not wanting to even eat creeps in there... there's a problem. I will answer the basics: No, I am not nor do I plan on taking medication. I thrive on a schedule. So early morning work outs and meal planning will make it all a lot easier. I take on others emotions, so surrounding myself with good friends is super important. Being present and enjoying the moment will help SO much. Also talking to a psychiatrist a couple of times a month has been a life saver. I think that I had about a year and a half where I took the world and put it on my shoulders. Mathew's surgery, 2 babies, my brother lived with us, my mom is well, my mom. When things started getting back "to normal", Mathew going back to work, Douglas starting school, my brother moving out, both kids becoming more independent, I looked around and I wasn't there anymore. I was so busy keeping everyone together that I had let my mind, my heart, my soul slip. I also like to be the motherly type. I take people under my wing and try to just smother them with kindness and love. Even to the detriment of my own family and health. That has to stop.

So day by day. We're living the life we were put here to live. A happy one. One that reflects our father and all the wishes he has for us. One in which we grow and learn every day. Just like the life I picture in my mind for my children. Be healthy, be kind, be happy, have fun, follow your dreams, and don't forget about the one that made you. You are representing your maker + your family every day. When you make mistakes and don't recognize that person in the mirror, just dust it off and start again. Every day is another opportunity to be better. Not better than anyone else, but better than the you you were yesterday.


Monday, May 20, 2013


Douglas graduated preschool last week.
Didn't he just start preschool?!

What am I going to do when he comes home and tells me how some dumb little kid was mean to him?!   I'm not opposed to punching 5 year olds in the face... That's not frowned upon is it?!

And it's not like he hasn't been the mean kid before... sometimes I think that may be just as bad. When YOUR kid is the bully. The one that tells another kid he doesn't like them.. or tells an adult that they have B.O... sigh. Is it that you worry about the kind of person they are becoming. Don't wish for them the pains and lonely lunch eating that accompany the kind of person that lacks a filter? Or is it a selfish thing. An embarrassment. It makes you feel like a bad parent because they haven't learned compassion/self control/manners/the golden rule which are YOUR job to teach them. It makes people think that their actions are a reflection on you and maybe you suck as a person. Maybe you talk smack about others at home. "Privately", you wouldn't DARE say it to them. But after all aren't our kids' personalities an amplification of ours?! It's like holding a mirror up to yourself... I didn't realize how often I put my hands on my hips until Isabella started doing it. Or that I may say bad things about the slow car in front of us... and about the person driving it until Douglas shouted, "hurry up you stupid car!". That Isabella could call her papa a pig because she heard grandma say, "papa is such a pig.." while cleaning up a mess he made [lovingly of course].

Douglas is [for the most part] a teacher's dream; he is usually pretty quiet, kind of shy, listens to instructions, a perfectionist. But will he be too quiet? Will kids look him over and he not have any friends?! Will he get behind in school because he's afraid to ask questions but not afraid to tell the teacher when they say something he thinks is wrong?! ugh.

But again. I think this will be harder on me. I'm being selfish. Though I know that as a parent my job is to ready him to enter the big scary world out there... I don't want to. Can't we just go live in a cave somewhere, just us. Where no one will ever break his heart and he can stay in his childish "why do you have lines on your belly" asking mentality..

But I love that boy. I love the things he loves. He asks how to get to heaven and if I can teach him sometime, when he's ready. He asks so many questions, about cows, grass, things I don't like. But I try to teach him, answer the questions I can about God's love and Michael Jackson. About matching clothes and how you shouldn't be afraid to try new things [even when I am]. I try to teach him about being nice to people, treating your friends and family with love and being considerate. About taking care of himself and how to shower. [we're working on him washing his own body. He has to know the name to EVERY part.. like the elbow pits + knee pits.. also the bankle. That's the back part of your ankle that holds a lot of dirt in the creases when you're running around barefoot. you're welcome for the information, it's free.]

He's a good kid. I think he's ready. He has to be. I have to be. It's happening.


Thursday, March 28, 2013

Oreo Pops

I told y'all I'd share a how-to on the Oreo pops I made for D's MJ birthday party... a few months later, I finally got around to it.

So I found this via Pinterest.

{this picture via}

Oreo Pops! Genius.

I didn't click on it. I just thought, "duh! I can do that!"


I figured out real quick that they're not as easy as they look at first glance. I went back and found the pin, but the link didn't have a step by step. I decided to take matters into my own hands. If there is another tut out there, I'm not sure. I just decided to figure it out.

Here's the quick how to: {emma style}

make room for the stick. Just scoop out some of the cream filling and... set it aside.. or eat it. Go ahead. Eat it. You know you want to. Don't waste it.

Melt a few candy melts at a time in a small bowl. I forgot to take a picture of the candy melts that I used. But you can find them here or pick them up at Hobby Lobby, Michael's, or even Walmart. Melt them {*HINT: if you over do it in the microwave and the melted candy becomes thick and just isn't working, add a little bit of coconut oil or shortening to smooth it back out.*}

Grab a stick that hasn't been licked clean {I got mine at the cake/wedding section at Walmart} and dip the lollipop stick in the melted candy.

Spread it around a bit. This will act as a glue to keep you Oreo on the stick. 

Place the other cookie part on top.

If you don't know your own strength like me I guess, they may crack.

No biggie. They'll be covered soon. Place them on a cookie sheet covered with wax paper

Now that all of those are on sticks you can melt the rest of the candy melts, or just a few more. Whatever you feel. Go with your gut. Follow your heart... Do whatever is easiest.

I used a spoon to cover the cookies with melted candy melts. AGAIN, don't try and make them so absolutely perfect. It's impossible. And they'll be eaten in an instant, no one will be inspecting them...  At least I wouldn't think so.

If you want them just white {or whatever color candy melt you got} and don't mind a flat side you can just put them right back on the wax paper, Or use one of these inexpensive cake pop stand things I also found at Walmart. {what can I say? Walmart is a necessary evil.}

If you want to add sprinkles you'll have to do it right after you cover the Oreo with the melted candy melts over a bowl before it dries. ONE AT A TIME. Just pour them on. Half dipped in sprinkles would look fab too!

And that's it. A little more time consuming than I assumed at first, but not to bad. You can also make them a couple of days ahead of time, just keep them covered.

Enjoy! And let me know if you make them or you come up with any new variations to try. I would also LOVE to see pictures. {email me here.}

Monday, January 14, 2013

Michael Jackson

Douglas turned 5 in November. 5 guys! 5!

I was planning a small birthday party for him. Nothing big, just a few kids playing video games. We told him that his party wouldn't be on his birthday [a Tuesday] but that following Saturday. He was cool with that.

But Douglas is obsessed with Michael Jackson.

A week before his birthday Douglas asked for a Michael Jackson party.

I had no clue what to do... but I did it.

The day before his birthday we gave him an early present.. Sparkly gloves, a fedora [thank you walmart little girls section] AND The Michael Jackson Experience game for the Wii. We played a bajillion times, my legs hurt.

The next day I let him wear his Adidas track suit to school, and let him take his hat. Then grandma picked him up from school for a fun birthday treat!

[top left: star confetti in clear ballons, top right: foam Michael Jackson gloves for balloon ping pong, bottom right: Michael Jackson Experience on the Wii.. Dace floor ready, bottom left: Michael Jackson hats with rock star stickers  to decorate them with. They were actually top hats from the New Year's section in the party store]
 The waiting drove Isabella nuts.

His delighted face was priceless... priceless I tell you.

The kids danced, played, had a blast.

The cake stumped me. But some silver sugar sprinkles fixed that. Glittery glove on the top.

Presents galore.

And that, ladies & gentlemen, is how you throw a last minute, small budget Michael Jackson party.

Friday, January 4, 2013

Homemade Ice Cream

So, you know I love pinterest. I'm sure you do too. I found a recipe for ice cream in a bag on there. I gave it a go and it worked fabulously! I wish I could give you the link to the pin and give the poster credit for it, but when I went to it again an error message popped up saying that someone had reported it as spam and the link has been removed. BUMMER!

Lucky for you, I wrote down the recipe! + even did a little experimenting. Which means that now I get to share it with you! And pinterest again.. 

You don't need an ice cream machine/maker thing... you just need 2 different sized zipper storage bags.

I use the Walmart brand freezer kind because they have the double zipper. If you're doing this with kids, you may want to label the smaller bags... "which one's mine?... are you sure?.. I don't think that one is mine! His looks better.." Annoying huh?

[Yes! Douglas likes to go by Michael Jackson.]

As part of trying to be healthier around here I think if we're going to have ice cream, even if it does have some sugar in it,the 3 ingredient kind is better for you than some of the ones you can buy in the store. You know, with all those chemicals that you can't even pronounce in them. This recipe yields about 1/2 a cup of ice cream. Perfect for a toddler or young child. Not perfect for a mom or dad who loves ice cream, so you may want to double it if you're making some for yourself. [I regretted not having made some for myself the first time. Don't repeat my mistake...] I also think that making it together is a special treat that we can have once in a while.. maybe once a week?!

Here is what you'll need:

[I'm not trying to promote Walmart here, I'm just cheap and buy their brand on things that don't really make a difference.]
1/2 cup of half + half
1 tablespoon of sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
The salt is for later... But you'll need about an 1/8 of a cup of it.

If you want to be a little wild and REALLY pack in some delicious nastiness like my kids did, then you can add about a teaspoon of flavored syrup. Chocolate to make chocolate ice cream OR strawberry syrup to make strawberry ice cream. I'm sure throwing in some mini chocolate chips or some small cut up pieces of strawberries would be delicious. Just don't go crazy on that though, a little goes a long way. We did NOT omit the vanilla when we did this, so I'm not sure how it would go without it.

When working with littles, I use a cup for the bag with the ingredients..

[like this!]
Because they want to do everything themselves and this keeps it confined and easier for them to work with.

Put the half + half, vanilla, and sugar in the small bag. Seal it up, and mix it up.

I didn't take my chances, I folded down the bag + taped it.

Set that aside for a bit and fill your big bag about half way with ice [you want to leave room for the ice cream bag]. Pour the salt in there and shake it up a bit.

[*The salt causes the ice to melt faster but also causes a lower freezing point... giving your ice cream a nice consistency, not just like frozen milk.]

Place the small bag with the ice cream mixture in the bigger bag with the ice in it.

I would recommend wrapping it with a dish towel so that your fingers don't freeze off AND so that the sweat from the ice melting doesn't fly everywhere... or get on the children's shirts and make Isabella freak out screaming that she needs her shirt off. Diva.

Set a timer for 5 minutes and let the kids shake it up.
Be warned: they will get tired after about 1 minute.
Hope you've been doing your kettle bell exercises. 
Ha! an easy way to do this without your arms getting tired is to place it on the counter or a table and shake it.
It should be done by the time your timer goes off and look something like this.

Cut the corner off of the bag and squeeze it into a bowl.

Or do like I do and eat it straight out of the bag.

The original post for this said that regular milk works also, but I have not tried that. I don't see why whole milk wouldn't work. Let me know if you try it with milk instead of half + half and how it goes... and if you come up with any recipes I MUST try!

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

2013 will be

The year I actually set some goals and actively try to accomplish them.

While growing up, my resolutions were always to do better in school, read more etc. Then when I "grew up" + got married they changed to things like don't waste so much money, budget, utilize my time wisely, be a better wife... Now that I'm a mom I honestly cannot remember what I've said the last few years, I haven't really made over it. But in my mind I have thought, "I'm going to do better. take better care of the house, just do more."

That's all fine + dandy, but I need to be more specific. So a few days ago I sat down and wrote 5 things that I wanted to do this year. Not just something I want to experience, but things that I want to change in myself. In my way of living, in my personality, in my daily life. While doing this I thought about how I might be able to actually get with it and get things together IF I took the time to make a timeline, put baby steps down below my BIG things that would help me get there. I've had this blog as a draft for about a week, just mulling it over.. With just my short list.

Last night one of my favorite people in the world, Susan Petersen posted her New Year's post- "on goal setting - five steps to take control of 2013". On how to actually keep your goals and accomplish them. It's like she read my mind. It was like she was talking specifically to me. If you haven't checked her out yet, you should. She's a celebrity you know.

Susan is also giving away a year of her fab baby moccasins to a lucky Instagramer. If you're not on there.. do it. New Year's Day is the last day to enter. Here are the details.

So here are my big goals. I have a whole separate list for Created, and a few personal goals that include my guy, my kids & my God, but I'm going to keep that private for now. I can't tell you guys everything! Sheesh.

»get healthy
»stay home more
»get organized
»make our house a home
»save/stop wasting money

And this is how I'm going to accomplish them.

»Get healthy + workout.
I put those 2 together because they go hand in hand. But how? What steps will I take to make this happen?

1. I'm going to try and cut as much sugar out of our diet as I can. We will be using natural stevia powder [no, not truvia] to sweeten most of what we will need sweetened. I'll mix it with apple fiber to use it in baking, and make liquid sweetener from it for our coffee & drinks.
2. I also have this love affair with pizza. ANY pizza. If it's pizza, I'll eat it. I could eat it for breakfast, lunch, + dinner.. on special occasions I do. Little Caesar's has it for $5 something. And it's right by Walmart  So get groceries but buy pizza to eat... That's dumb. But I do it. Not all the time, but embarrassingly more than I should. I won't do that anymore. Unless it's my birthday.
3. More water. No soda. [I also love pepsi.] and my children love apple juice, LOVE it. but I'm hoping more natural teas sweetened with honey or stevia. But definitely more water.
4. Very little fast food. Except for our yearly Sonic corn dogs on Halloween, or maybe alot ourselves 1 fast food meal a month. This will save money AND help us get healthy.
5. Eat homemade. Not just less fast food, but make our own granola bars instead of buying the packaged ones, make our own taco seasoning instead of buying the one with all the chemicals in it. Make our own ice cream as a special treat. Since I love pizza so much, maybe have our own pizza night where all of us make individual pizzas, on homemade crust with homemade pizza sauce, maybe even homemade mozzarella.Things like that.
6. workout. Take the time to do it. I love yoga. love. it. But I can't be all namaste with kids yelling at me. So I'll GO to yoga class once a week. AND work out at home at least 2 -3 days a week. I have a hard time with that. Like I should be doing dishes or vacuuming instead. It's that friggen mommy-guilt.

»Stay home more.
This will help me with getting organized, making our house a home, AND getting healthy. I'll have time to make mozzarella, and granola bars.

1.Get organized. I'll make shopping lists and meal lists and activity lists so that when D has school I'll get everything I need while I'm out instead of having to go back to the store because I forgot something.
2.Allot time for activities + play dates. Just not too many, it is ok to say no. Have friends over more often.
3.Stop instant gratification. Sometimes I see something on tv or have an idea and have to have it right away. Mathew + I are both like that. He's was worse than me, but now we just met somewhere in the middle. You're not going to die if you don't get it right away, just wait til the next time you're in town Emma. Wait.

»Get organized.
1.Plan our meals. I used to do this and it's amazing.
2.Keep a laundry schedule and actually stick to it! I have one already made up, when I stick with it, it works like a charm. A load a day except sunday, some days 2 loads.
3. Stick with a cleaning schedule. An area a day type thing.
4. Declutter.

»Make our house a home.
I feel complimented when most of my friends say that they feel so at home at our house. We must too because this place is usually a pit. There's clothes and toys everywhere. The kids are often seen wearing clothes then just underwear, then a different set of clothes... later I find clothes under the couch cushions and just strewn on the floor. And I'm sad to admit that the kids are not the only ones.

1.Accomplish previous resolution. That would help a lot, specially the decluttering part.
2.Put things where they go RIGHT AWAY. Sometimes I open a package in the living room and set the trash on the coffee table instead of walking over to the trashcan and throwing it away. When I get up I forget to take it with me. Later I find it on the floor in pieces. I could get upset at the kids or the dog, but it's my fault. Same with dishes. I have a drink while I'm crocheting on the couch. I finish my drink but don't take it to the kitchen, then forget about it. Next time I do the same thing, now 2 cups on the end table. LAZY. That's what it is. No way around it. Stop doing that.
3.Fatigue doesn't last forever. If you need to stay up an extra 30 minutes to do dishes + clean the counters, do it! It's better to wake up tired to a clean kitchen and picked up house than to wake up tired to a messy and dirty house.
4.Paint. Sew. Make.

»Save/stop waiting money.

They all flow together don't they. Getting organized will help us get healthy by planning meals and giving us a schedule. It will also help me keep up with things around the house, which will make us happier at home and help me have time to take out to work out. Doing all of that will require me to be home more... which I'll want to be because I'll love it here. I'll want to make it prettier, make it ours. I'll have more time to sew, make pillow covers, curtains.. eek! Bake more food! Cook more, which goes back to the healthy thing. The possibilities are endless. All of this will help save money. No more wasting it on crappy food. I'd rather spend more on good food. No more wasting it on gas running around after crap either!

I know that some people would look at staying home more as a sucky thing, but I'm really looking forward to it. I'm excited. 2013 will be a good year. What are some of the things you hope to accomplish + change this year?! I'd love to hear about them!