i'm going to have to...

take a break from this.
I don't want to.
what I really want to do is crawl under my covers & not come out until wednesday for my doctor's appointment.
I want to know what's going on with my body.
I want to be fixed.
I hate feeling like the living dead.
but in reality...
I'm a mom.
I can't  crawl under the covers never to be seen again.
I have butts to wipe,
mouths to feed.
tons of easter candy given early from grandma that needs to be rationed, maybe just put away.
not to mention the laundry.
dishes.
baths.
Isabella's turning 1 on tuesday so that includes:
baking a cake just for her,
cupcakes for everyone else.
celebrating with Mathew's side, we did that today.
she was lovely, she's beautiful
I can't believe she's 1.
also need to celebrate with my side of the family.
we're doing that tomorrow night.
There are so many other things that I want to do.
need to do.
just can't, not without feeling like I'll pass out & die right where I'm at.
even singing happy birthday with everyone to her today made me feel breathless.
so blogging, etsy, everything is going to be on the back burner at least for the first part of this week.
Isabella comes before all of that & I want to be "present" for her birthday, not just there.
I'll be back to post pictures of the most beautiful birthday girl you've ever seen.
& to tell you what my doc tells me.
that is if it's not too private.
my biggest fear is that he'll tell me that there's nothing wrong with me.
that it's just in my head.
well, that would figure.

if it's not one thing it's another

all weekend I've been thinking I might bleed to death. being a girl, with girl problems is a pain. literaly. I've felt useless. paged my doc, because everything has to happen on the weekend, & he helped me feel a little less "freaked out". still gotta call him on Monday to follow up though..

now this:

swollen eyes. stuffed/runny nose. clingy. allergies? a cold because of this crazy weather? who knows.

she's a cuddle bug & I'm kind of incapable of doing anything that takes more than 10 or 15 minutes. that is if I can get 10 or 15 minutes without having to wipe a nose, butt, feed someone, eat something so I don't pass out, or clean up a mess. I don't mind. cuddling with this one is one of my favorite things to do. she's beautiful. she's almost one. unbelievable. the only thing I regret, is being in the middle of "spring cleaning". I have stuff out. just out. because I was organizing. now it's just out there. a picture is leaning against the wall in the hallway, just looking at me. wondering why i took it down 4 days ago & haven't done anything with it. sheets need to be put away, things need to be organized, cleaned. I was half way done with the upstairs. now I'll have to start over. weird thing is. I'm kind of looking forward to it. I also want to plant a small garden (D's idea). who by the way is the best child ever. he's a great helper. a great brother. my favorite little boy.

I've read the next 2 chapters in Created To Be A Help Meet, just haven't had a chance to type up my commentary for you. I will though. I promise. it's just kinda difficult with a1 yr old pounding on the keyboard!

focus

I love making things.. all sorts of thing.
I'm very crafty.
my friends & I started Created to sell some of our items.
I'm all over the place. if it looks easy & cute, I can make it!
because I love making cakes also I have a branch of Created named babe.E.cakes.

My friend Jenni told me that I need to pick a focus group. I need to know who I'm targeting & what I want to sell. but I like to do everything. everything!

but she's right.

I've decided to focus on "kid's accessories & mommy must-haves!"

I will offer things like:

this bag handle by make it and love it. Now that I've got 2 kids this is a "mommy must-have"

crayon rolls

tutus, hats, bows

quilts

& capes. definitely capes

I will also satisfy my "learn how to do everything" craving by making myself things & custom orders for the previously mentioned Jenni & you if you'd like. 

for babe.E.cakes I will focus on kid's parties. examples here & here. but again will also do custom orders for other events as well.

it's gonna be great! :)